Greetings, infidels! Behold! I have mastered the 666 arts of web design to bring you a “web blog”–or, as I have dubbed it, a “wlog!” Lean back in your office chairs, grab yourselves a Mountain Dew, and set your faces to “bask.”
Okay, actually? Get the Mountain Dew first.
Who the Dang are You?
I am The Architect. 'sup.
I am Bill Baconhill–an entirely non-creative pseudonym that I came up with late one night about two years ago. If you’ve come to this blog, there is a greater than 50% chance–at least as of this first post–that you know my real name anyway, but I’ll be cold in the ground before I dispense with the aliases at Post One. It was my name on my The Twitteh, it became my alias for Online Gamings, and eventually (i.e., now), it became my blog name and I saddled it with a lot of references to a mediocre decade-old sci-fi trilogy. It is my hope that I hit you over the head with much less heavy-handed Christian symbology, but I’m not making any promises, and I’m not convinced that I’ll be able to help it.
I’m a lot of things–father, husband, writer, teacher, linguistic hobbyist, nerd of sundry passions, old-timey video game fan, and big fat dude. I live in a little farm town in Ohio. Not much happens there. A long time ago, we were supposed to get a Greyhound bus hub, but nothing came of it. We still named our school mascot the “Greyhound,” though. We’re naïve that way.
Why the Sudden Interest in Blogging?
I’ve always told my students that we’ve got a story to tell. There was a time when I used to pride myself in telling my story, but I feel like I’ve gotten away from that. Needless to say, these are crazy times. Things are blowing up, falling into the ocean, and exploding into riots full of disgruntled firefighters and freelance haberdashers. I don’t come with insights, but I do come with stories. I think those are more effective anyway–and they’re always more interesting to read.
So without pretenses, this will be a log. On the web. It’ll cover a variety of my interests, but as it goes on, there’s a good chance something will catch my eye and I’ll run with it, at which point I’ll probably dispense with that goofy MSPaint drawing from the last section.
Variety of Interests, Eh?
Yes, hang on, I’m getting there.
At this point, I conceive The Baconatrix to cover three specific topics and one general one. I will sort these topics into various gories of a cate persuasion, thus proving myself a wholly original contributor to Da Web.
Solid Editing and Proofreading will cover words–writing them, reading them, and teaching them. I do a lot of all three. I write my own fiction on the side, specializing in adventure stories, magical realism, comedy, fantasy, soft sci-fi, and cephalopodic bromance. I also teach freshman composition and developmental writing at various local schools, and you KNOW lots of fun happens there. As is my policy, names are always changed to protect the extremely guilty of plagiarism.
The Nerdaean Hydra will cover a few general geek fixations, from video games to tabletop roleplaying games. I’m more of a dabbler now than I once was (having two kids will do that to you), but I still know how to dig my Apparatus of Kwalish out of my Bag of Holding, if you know what I mean (NOTE: If you don’t know what I mean, that’s actually not as disgusting as you think it is.).
El Santo. Not pictured: nude vampire temptresses.
Santo vs. El Blog is where I’ll likely lose you if “blogging about teaching and D&D” didn’t, as it covers one of my weirder interests: professional wrestling. The squared circle. The greatest ridiculous show on Earth. I’m not going to focus on news, recaps, and rumors (which you can get elsewhere with more gusto from people less likely to miss a show than me); rather, I’ll cover some news items and offer my own perspectives on rasslin’s place in culture at large. I hope it’s a bit smarter than what you’d expect.
Finally, Leftover Grease covers everything else. Check the other tags and categories for more insight here.
If you have any questions, see me after class. Okay?
Let’s Get Crack-a-Lackin’?